Robin Lost Her Groove

AUGH! I got out of the groove. You know the one. You determine you are modifying some behavior and at first you are in that determined mode and nothing gets in your way. You are firmly in the groove and headed in the right direction. Those days you wonder why it ever seemed so hard. You make all kinds of plans and you look into the future and you can even imagine yourself succeeding. Well, at least for a little bit.

But . . . it's hard to stay in the groove. Life gets in the way. Emotions get in the way. Time gets in the way. Sin gets in the way. Need I go on?

I'm sitting here at Coffee Cat with my iced coffee beside me reflecting over my efforts at healthy living. The last two days I have been eating off program. Why? Well, I don't know. Because life is kind of weird right now. Sleep is weird. I'm unfocused and unorganized, my usual when there's too much to do. People I love are sick. And probably I'm off program because I can use all these things as excuses.

Trinity Kay is sitting here beside me. She just happened to walk in and there happened to be an empty seat along the wall beside me. She's been talking about all these cool things that God has done in her life recently. Trinity can see God everywhere. Even the totaling of her car!

Me? I think I have some neuron re-routing to do because that's certainly not my first thought. Did I pray these last two days when I got off track? No. Instead of praying I tried to hide it. ?? Did I see God active in my life during this time? No. Did I trust him to care about my frustrations, my wanderings? No. Was I open to his discipline to teach me? No. Those immediate thought processes of Trinity's don't come automatically for me. If I had turned to God and poured out my heart I could have had help. I could have had forgiveness. I could have had love. I just didn't want to face it at all so I hid.

Trinity says she's reading a book about intentional living. Hm. What a concept. Do you I might need to read that book? Do you think it's a fluke, just fate or an accident that Trinity stopped by and we had a talk about intentional living and what that means? Nah, me either.

So . . . I think I'll stop and pray. I think I'll tell God what I did (like he doesn't know) and tell him how much I need him. How much I want to trust him even when I don't feel like I can. I think I'll ask for strength and direction. I think I'll keep my eyes open to see HIS groove and get myself firmly entrenched. Robin, get your groove back!