Victory followed by Defeat

Ok, that was a little bit of an exaggeration. I did have victory at the scales. Almost too much of a victory? I lost seven lbs. Now, I'm not upset about losing seven pounds, I just don't know how I did that. I was very careful about staying within my points but other times when I have done that I sure didn't lose that much. So, I'll assume that this was a super week and not be upset if it doesn't happen again or if the next week or two is slow. But seven pounds!! woo hoo. That makes the total lost from my highest weight is 12lbs off! only 213 lbs to go. no big deal.
The defeat part was the afternoon of weigh in day. Let's just say it was out of control. I did what I frequently do. I knew I wanted, and felt I deserved, a planned treat.
Hmm, let's see, what can I have to reward myself? A McDonalds ice cream cone would be good. it's a hot day so that would be perfect. Darn, that ice cream cone didn't taste like I thought it would. In fact it didn't have much taste at all. Well that's disappointing. I'll just have something else. How about a piece of pie. That's the ticket. I'll enjoy that. Darn again, I ate it but it wasn't satisfying. What's with that? And here I am, all those points gone and I still NEED some sweet treat. Or, maybe I need something salty. Maybe that's the problem. I know, I'll have french fries. Those are "bad" so it will really feel like a treat if I have those. One french fry, two french fries, all the french fries. Still not it. Well, I've really blown it now. I better make myself add all these points up and track them. How many points? NO WAY!
That's the way the afternoon went. Going from a great weigh in to a mess of a frantic binge. It was disappointing. Took all day to get myself to face it, write it, accept it and most importantly, talk to myself the way that I should. I'm here to report that I didn't die and in fact have lived to get back on track.
The next few weeks are going to be difficult. I will be traveling and livng away from home and that's when I lose my ability to stay in charge, stay in control. Will have to see if I can change that this time.