Tiny Hope

I have lost ten pounds. Almost afraid to say that. I have inched, our ounced, my way down. I'm afraid it won't last. I'm afraid I won't last.

The best thing that has happened lately is the Friday evening WW meeting. It's for people who have 50 or more pounds to lose. OK, so I'm still the largest person there, but it's better than sitting in a room full of people who need to lose 8lbs or 12lbs or 16lbs. I certainly applaud them for being there and making changes in their life, it just that they will only be there for a month or two or three. I, however, will be there for years. The people who come in to lose their weight when they have small amounts to lose are so smart. They stopped their behavior early before too much damage was done. But, it reminds me that I didn't do that. They are talking about getting back into their size 4 clothes and I am wondering if I will ever get back into size 24 clothes. Unfortunately, those of us who have gained massive amounts of weight have multiple problems that go beyond the normal overweight person. We have size issues that we deal with every day. We have long ingrained habits that take long and painful efforts to change. We have emotional reasons for abusing ourselves. We feel shame and are afraid to be honest about our problems. Thus, a group specifically designed for us --- it's a good thing.